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Jmd123 | May 14th, 2010, 10:31 pm | |
Oscoda, MI Posts: 2611 | Some of you (hey Spence) have noticed that I've been doing a bit - OK, a LOT - of ranting here on this site lately, primarly due to my frustrations of being unemployed and what I perceive to be rampant "anti-environmentalism" that has been around lately. So, I thought perhaps I should lighten the mood - at least, MY mood - with a few fishing jokes. The first was told to me by the fellow who ran the fly shop where I learned to first tie my own flies 20 years ago - the Troutpost in Lansing, MI, which I'm not sure still exists since I haven't been there in a long time (anyone have any info?). The other was a ripoff of a funny story that I read as a kid and incorporated into a 5th-grade class assignment to write a humorous story about a person seeking spiritual advice from a great guru. So, here goes... #1: "You know, if you tie EYES on your flies, they'll never get snagged." "Really? How come?" "They can SEE where they're going!" And, #2: A man seeking spiritual guidance went to a guru and had a pressing question to ask him. "Oh, great Swami, I need to ask you about an experience I had recently." "Yes, my son, go ahead and tell me." "Well, I was recently out fishing in my boat, when I got a very upset stomach. I figured the way to take care of it was to take some Alka-Seltzer, so I pulled out a packet of pills and was about to drop them into a glass of water. Instead, I fumbled and the pills fell over the side of the boat and into the water. As I watched them sink and start to fizz, much to my amazement, a large bass came up and swallowed the fizzing pills! In total disbelief, I watched this fish rise to the surface as the fizzing pills in it's stomach filled it with gas and it became lighter than water. I grabbed it by the lip and it was the biggest bass I caught that day!" "Congradulations, my son! You got a nice one! But, you said you had a question for me." "Oh yes, great Swami, I do. Why would the fish swallow those pills? I can't imagine that it looked anything like food to him!" "Why, don't you see, my son? The fish must have had an upset stomach TOO!!" Without further comment... Jonathon | |
No matter how big the one you just caught is, there's always a bigger one out there somewhere... | ||
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